The Constitution of Tippa

WE, THE CITIZENS OF TIPPA, IN ORDER TO FORM A MORE PERFECT FRIENDSHIP, ESTABLISH JUSTICE FOR UNPAID SPLITS, PROMOTE FELLOWSHIP, PRESERVE OUR MEMORIES, CELEBRATE LIFE'S MILESTONES, AND SECURE THE BLESSINGS OF GOOD COMPANY FOR OURSELVES AND FUTURE CITIZENS, DO ORDAIN AND ESTABLISH THIS CONSTITUTION FOR THE REPUBLIC OF TIPPA.

Founded upon the belief that no achievement should go uncelebrated, no citizen should eat alone when others are available, and no promised party shall be forgotten by the passage of time.

Recognizing that history is written not only by great nations, but also by friend groups with excessive documentation, inside jokes, and an alarming number of committees.

Affirming that friendship carries with it certain sacred obligations, including but not limited to showing up, checking in, participating in group photos, responding eventually, and contributing to the collective archive of memories.

Acknowledging that every citizen possesses the inalienable rights to celebration, companionship, unreasonable confidence, and public roasting when circumstances clearly warrant it.

And accepting that some events, decisions, scandals, hairstyles, bets, financial choices, and late-night messages may forever remain part of the historical record regardless of future regret.

Therefore, with full knowledge of the responsibilities, privileges, and inevitable embarrassment that citizenship entails, we establish this Constitution so that the Republic of Tippa may endure, prosper, and continue generating stories far beyond what any sensible organization would permit.